This quarantine showed me:
- how little I actually need stuff
- with how little I can be happy
- to be grateful for what I have, — recheck myself periodically for it
- what it means to live one day at a time
But it also made me ponder, was I already living one day at a time? Is my love for video games the grand escapism show that I'm putting myself subject to in the face of my gargantuan lack of purpose in life?
I mean, what do I want my life to represent?
Having a family and kids was never the ultimate goal. That's just something you're brainwashed about. Being wild and free, doing what you want when you want makes things ambiguous, unstable. But isn't that what's fun about it? The moment you stop and settle, you're doomed. It's death.
Trying to achieve that constantly-rising level of basic needs. Like trying to touch the horizon. Fulfil the glass of destiny that has a hole in its bottom.
Great weather outside but no solitary sunbathing in parks okay?
#justpondering
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